How do I gain the confidence back in marriage?

I've had a lot of failures in relationship, and i'm losing confidence in marriage. I always think that i won't be able to find someone that will love me forever and i will end up in divorce. Looking at the divorce rate today, that makes me harder to settle down even if i've found someone that i love. How do i overcome this fear?How do I gain the confidence back in marriage?
Dear MimiMomo,


I understand that you have had a lot of failures in your past relationships, that is in the past. Don't dwell on that you need to move on forward not back. The Past is the Past. You also can think way at the beginning that you relationship is going to a divorce way before it even starts. You are setting yourself up for failure. You need to think and meditate and relax that you are going to do the best that you can to make the relationship that comes up or the one you are already into.


You are already worried about something that has not happened or is not going to happen and if it does. Don't take so deeply serious most of the time we try our very best we do what we are suppose to do to be there for our husband and be the very best wife and keep on top of every part of their needs and they leave us. It's a they thing not us. You know that you give 100% of yourself in your relationship and God knows I have and what it's never enough for them. So don't take it as a personal thing that is a myth. Give yourself a chance at happiness it's possible you know, believe or it does exist. Be confident.





Good LuckHow do I gain the confidence back in marriage?
Step back for a time and evaluate what is going wrong, sometimes it is the other person, sometimes it's yourself but IN most cases it's both people. You have to figure out why the relationships are not working.


Remember it takes not only love and trust, but huge amounts of compromise and patience, on both sides, for a long term relationship. It also helps if you are of the same faith, agree about children and how to discipline them too.
That's the trouble with love...When it comes to love it's always a risk. There's always a chance of having your heart broken. But you can't concentrate on that, you need to be totally honest with your mate about your feelings and your fears up front. You need to look for the best and realize that no person is ever going to be perfect, even you. We are all human and we all have our weaknesses and strong points. We must learn not to expect perfection from others and learn the art of forgiveness. The statistics are high for divorce, have you ever wondered why?...Have you ever looked into the reasons?...For the most part it's financial, couples get in too much debt because they want everything and can't wait to get it, so they go into enormous debt which causes a strain on their marriage. For some it's things like alcoholism, drugs, abusiveness, etc...I used to tell my sons, if you want to find a good wife, don't look in your local bar, you might find a 'babe', but, she's going to like to drink. Don't find one at a wild party, she likes to party, and with that comes its own set of problems...You really have to get to know someone, their likes and dislikes, and what they want in life. Make sure you're compatible and that you have many of the same interests. If you're a spiritual person, make sure you're on the same page their too. The more you have in common going in, the better your chance of staying together will be. Don't fall for the, 'once we're married he/she will change'....it doesn't work... - Good Luck!
Unless you want children, I wouldn't worry about getting married. Don't put so much pressure into marriage, nothing says that you have to get married. Don't just look at the #'s of divorce, look at the reason for them--are these issues that you have personally, if not, then you should be 1/2 as worried already.
u dont have to get married to settle down. i know more couples that are happy just being boy and girlfriend for years than I know happily married couples. i have a 2 strike rule. my first marriage didnt work and once i get married agian if it doesnt work i will not do it again. thats it.
The thing with life and love is, i've learned is that, ';Once you give up, and stop trying..it will happen';. If you keep thinking about this it's going to bug you like no other. You will find love, you will find the one..it sometimes takes time. I'm Sorry, and good luck hun!
just have faith that you will find the right person, and even if things do end in divorce, it is NOT the end of the world..life will go on.
Counseling.